Monday, February 22, 2010

Love Fest

I’ve been thinking a lot about love lately. All different kinds, but mostly the kind of love Jesus commanded us to have for one another. Over a year ago, I was really burdened by the “Love Chapter”. Yes, the verses I grew up seeing in cross-stitch on the wall, the verses I had heard so many times and thought were beautiful, made me sad. I knew I had not been living those words.


Not just in that chapter, but in many, many verses, God commands us to love one another.

“Love your enemies…” Matthew 5:44

“Love your neighbor as yourself”- Matthew 22:39

“You yourselves have been taught by God to love each other.” I Thessalonians 4:9

“Above all things have fervent love for one another” I Peter 4:1-8

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I go around hating people. I generally get along with people. I like to do things for people who need things. I try to be kind to others even when they aren’t so nice to me. But I had to ask myself, “Do you love others like He wants you to?” The answer was plainly no. It is awful to see flaws so clearly. And as I read in I Corinthians 13, it doesn’t matter what good I do, even with the best intentions, if I don’t love the ones I am doing it for.

I began to pray and ask God to help me love people. Even the ones that don’t deserve it, the ones I don’t want to love, the ones that need it. I put I Corinthians 13:1-3 on my refrigerator and told God “Send the Love!” Did a love fest ensue? No, not really. I became aware of what I needed to be feeling and thought about it a lot. I kept on loving the people it was easy to love, but with the awareness, brought more prayer and conscious effort. I didn’t want to have to TRY to love people though; I wanted it to flow out of me.

Recently, Bro. Dennis Smith has been talking about love too and teaching about what God has to say about it through His Word. One night he was teaching from the “Love Chapter” and told us to take I Corinthians 13:4-8, the portion of the chapter where God explains what love is, and to replace the word “Love” with “Jesus”. Jesus is love.

JESUS is patient, JESUS is kind. JESUS does not envy….

Then, because our goal should be to emulate Jesus in every way, Bro. Dennis told us to put our own name in the place of “Jesus”.

….Anna does not boast, Anna is not proud, Anna is not rude, Anna is not self-seeking…

Then at the beginning and end of each day we were to think of being what LOVE is and then evaluate the outcome.

Okay, basically, I STINK at loving.

Even though my actions might be right some of the time, my heart is often far behind. I am not even loving my family and friends properly. I thought they were the easy ones! But, instead of giving up, I am trying to see my mistakes, ask forgiveness, and am seeking to do better next time.

Most of you know I am a nurse. Nearly all of the patients I take care of are a joy to be with. But…sometimes…those challenging situations come along. I usually start with a good attitude but by the end of my shift, my good intentions have gone down the drain. While I feel I am never rude to my patients, I don’t always think the nicest thoughts.

Last night, I helped a fellow nurse and friend deal with a difficult situation. Her patient became very confused at bedtime. She did know who she was, where she was, or what day it was. She began to pick and pull at all of the lines and tubes that were in place to make her better. No amount of reorientation, explanation, or instruction did any good. My friend was exhausted from trying to keep the patient from harming herself. I was able to assist my friend in caring for her. After we had completed the necessary procedures at the time, I told my friend that I would stay with the patient while she took a much needed break. The patient had a one sided weakness, so I only had to take care of one hand to keep her from undoing her lines. We dimmed the lights, I held that hand, and sat with her. At first she pulled away, then, she began to squeeze my hand like it gave her comfort to have it there. After a few minutes of quiet, she dozed off to sleep.

For about 30 minutes, I held her hand, prayed for her, her nurse, and her doctors. At times my other hand rested on her chest to help me count her shallow breaths. But mostly, during that interval, I just loved her.

God allowed me, for a short while, to experience what I want to become all the time. That woman had done nothing to deserve my love. She had not endeared anyone by her actions or attitudes. I did not just care for her because it was my job, or because I felt sorry for her. I cared for her because I loved her, not just as myself, as but more than myself.

By God’s grace and power, this work in progress, has made a little progress. My plan is to keep at it, and maybe one day before I go to meet my Maker, I might one of the main participants in His love fest. Oh, that I might one day become so filled with His love, that it oozes from my pores for all to see and give honor to Him!

But until that day, I will be repeating over and over,



“Love is patient, love is kind.

It does not envy, it does not boast,

It is not proud. It is not rude,

It is not self-seeking; it is not easily angered,

It keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil;

But rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts,

Always hopes, always preserves.

Love never fails.”

I Corinthians 13:4-8a

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