Big Announcement

This evening we announced to the children that the new baby's
name would be Dinah.

These are the statements I received in reply:



"D-I-N-A-H?!?! Are you serious?"

"Is that even a real name?"

"Is that a boy's name?"

"I thought the baby's name was Georgia Sparkles!"

"At school we have a soup named Dyna." To this I replied,
"What?" Tess said, "Yeah, its so hot. Like dynamite. We call
it Dyna. Do you really want to name the baby after a soup?"

"DINAH! I'm just not so sure about this mom."

"I think I'm going to throw up."



I really like the name. Eric does too. This is a milestone in our
baby naming. We usually name our babies in the hospital because
we can never agree on a name until then. I was so proud of it until
I was shot down by 3 well-meaning children. I just don't feel
God leading us to"Georgia Sparkes".

I think that, despite the bad feedback in the polls, we are going to
stick to that name. We are working on the baby's second name.
That may end up being a hospital thing.

The baby is thriving. She is an active little girl. All of her sonogram
pictures looked great. Thanks for praying for us. Please continue
to do so.

Love,
Anna

P.S. I hope her name doesn't make you want to throw up.

Unto You A Child Is Born

When my two oldest children asked to audition for the Christmas play that
the Corinth Theatre Arts was producing this year, I was reluctant to allow
them to do it. We were so busy already and I was not sure that we could
manage to add one more activity. Eric assured me that he would be able
to get them there most of the time. This was something that they wanted
to do for a long time so I gave my consent.


I took them to the auditions. I encouraged them to do their best. I also
reminded them that this was their first time trying out for a play, and to
not be disheartened if they did not get a part. They are very talented and
this would be experience for the future. I asked them if they were
nervous and Ty said, “A little.” Tess was just excited. We filled out the
audition forms and walked into the auditorium. I gave them a hug and sat
in the back with the other parents, while they went to sit up front.

Kelly, the director, introduced herself and explained how the evening
would go. The first thing she wanted them to do is to go up on stage one
by one, introduce themselves, and sing a song. My breath caught in my
throat. I knew there would be singing in the play but we had not prepared
anything to sing tonight. I was so far away from the kids; I couldn’t go
down and talk with them about it. All I could do was sit in my seat, wait,
and try not to be anxious for them.

When it was Tess’s turn she did not hesitate. She marched right on stage
and announced she would be singing “Free to Be Me” by Francesca
Battistelli. I smiled as she belted out our family’s favorite tune. She knew
all the words because when the song came on the radio, we
turned up the volume, and all sang at the top of our lungs. She did a great
job. Ty was a bit more nervous as he sang Zac Ephron’s “All Star” from
High School Musical, but he also performed very well.

The rest of the evening went more like what we had prepared for. When
they were done, Ms. Kelly announced that she would post the cast list in a
few days. In the car on our way home, the kids told me that they felt really
good about their audition. I told them how proud I was of them. I told them
that I loved the songs they picked out. I asked them if it had made them
scared when she asked them to sing alone. Tess said, “Why, Momma? I
know I can sing.”

The conversation ceased and we were quiet for the rest of the ride. I
couldn’t keep a smile off of my face. My children amazed me. When I
was a child, I fainted before a school play because I was so nervous about
my role as Sweet Betsy from Pike. All I had to do was dance with my Big
Husband Ike. But to go out in front of all of those people was so scary. I
was so thankful that my kids can perform without letting anxiety control
them.

The cast list went up. Ty was cast as one of the Herdmans’. Tess’s role
was that of an angel. They were so happy. My little actors were very serious
about learning their parts. Ty knew all of his lines within the week. Tess
practiced her one line over and over. Who knew there were one thousand
ways to say, “What’s wrong with my wings?”? They never complained
about the long practices 4 times a week. They did their homework in the
car on the way home or at the theatre. I never had to get on to them.

This past week they performed the play eight times. I was able to go to six
of them. The play is “The Best Christmas Pageant Ever”. It is about a
group of basically heathen children, the Herdman’s, who go to church for
the first time and end up taking over the Christmas play. The Christmas
story unfolds for the first time for the children. Their behavior, questions,
and reactions first shock the church members, but eventually teach them
all about the miracle of Christ’s birth and Love that gave the Child in the
first place.

What my children see as something fun, is much more than that. This play
is funny. I laughed and laughed. But it also makes me think. Do I hold to
my traditions and self imposed rules so tightly, I miss sharing a gift so
wonderful as to save the world? Do I turn my nose up, and shake my head
at people who weren’t taught to behave just like me? Does the way I
spend my time, reflect the purpose God intended me for?

I have been beating myself up lately because today, 9 days before
Christmas, I still don’t have any decorations up. No tree, no garland, not
even a wreath. We haven’t baked together, trimmed the mantel, or drank
hot chocolate. I still don’t have all our Christmas presents bought, much
less have them wrapped. I haven’t attended any parties. My Christmas
card pictures still haven’t come in. My hours have been cut at work the
past few months and no extra shifts came my way this year. The number
of gifts that sit on the floor without a tree won’t be as many this year.

Are my kids going to put this down as the worst Christmas ever? I hope
not. They were a part of something beautiful. The time I spent getting them
to practices and performances weren’t wasted. This year, even though I
hope they knew it before, they are seeing that Christ came for all people,
even the messy, misbehaved ones. I hope they will see that Christmas is
still wonderful even without inflatable snowmen on our lawn, lots of ribbon
and greenery, and without the gaming system they wanted. Maybe they
will see that what we give away to others wasn’t as easy as it might have
been. That each gift was given with love that was greater because there
was a little sacrifice involved. I hope that we will be more thankful than
ever for shelter, food, and clothing.

The play runs for three more performances this weekend at Corinth
Theatre Arts. The show starts at 7:30pm on Friday and Saturday and at
2 pm on Sunday. Come see it if you can.

Merry Christmas!


HEY! UNTO YOU A CHILD IS BORN!!-Gladys Herdman

When My Heart Is Breaking....

I know I have been quiet for a while. For those of you who thought
I couldn’t be, are you impressed?


I have been away, away at war. No physical battle, just a fight for
truth when my feelings overwhelmed me with lies. Thankfully, I am
much better and Christ is the victor. I am not proud of the story I
am about to tell you, but I have to tell you about the ugly parts, so
you can understand the beautiful way that God works through my
weakness.

When I was pregnant with our son Jack, many people asked me
if I he would be our last. I guess many were thinking, “It’s your
fourth kid, it has GOT to be your last!” I know that family planning
is mostly the norm. We often assume that we can choose how
many little ones grace our home. For Eric and me, our attempts
at controlling the number and timing of our offspring were thwarted
very early on in our marriage. God let us know who was boss right
away as we had one precious surprise after another. So in
response to that question, I always replied, “I don’t feel ‘done’.”
God had never given me the signal to quit. I never felt that Jack
would be the caboose to our family train.

Many of you know what happened. Two days before I was
expected to deliver Jack into this world, he went ahead of us
to heaven to wait for us there. His death proved once again
how little control we actually have over our existence and the
futility of thinking we do. So about six months after Jack went
to be with Jesus, I began to ask God for another child. I also
prayed that if He allowed me to become pregnant again, that
I wouldn’t be afraid.

Now, after about a year of those prayers, we are anticipating
the birth of another child. In the few months that we have
known this, my world has been spinning. From the beginning,
this pregnancy has been like none other I have had. There
was a question of this baby’s viability and health since day one.
Instead of joy and peace, I have had anguish and uncertainty.
The fear I had prayed against for so long crept in anyway.
Questions, anger, and loneliness came as its companions.
Because I did not want to feel these emotions, shame joined
in as well. He asks so little of me and I failed Him again.

I never questioned God after Jack died, but I was full of them
now. I wanted to know, “Why now? Why this baby? Of all
of my children, You choose the baby after the one who died
for me to have trouble with??! Why would You instill a desire
for more children in me if I can’t have any more? The doctors
say they think I may have lost a twin. What am I supposed to
do with that information? What am I supposed to feel about
that? Did I, or didn’t I?”

I chose not to attach myself to the baby, so there was no
excitement with each sonogram. It was all just more information
until we went for the next one. I only told a few people about
what was going on. I couldn’t have the children find out we
were having a baby that might die. They would be so hurt again.
So I had to pretend to most people around me. We are all “fine”,
right?

The most horrible thing that happened was that I felt alone. After
experiencing years of intimate time in God’s presence, it seemed
that He was gone. I didn’t feel His arms around me. I spoke,
and heard no reply. Where did He go? At first, I was too ashamed
of what I was feeling to even show Him my face. Then, when I
tried to talk to Him, it was as if He wasn’t there. I thought, “Fine,
I don’t really like what You have going for me anyway. I won’t talk
to You either.” But after a few days, I couldn’t stand it. I called out
to Him in prayer during the day. At night, I would awake from
troubled sleep to hear my own voice softly begging, “Come back
to me, please, come back to me.”

Thankfully, we are now at 14 weeks and the baby seems to be
doing well. We heard a heartbeat of 160 at the last check-up.
Because we are past 12 weeks, our chances of losing the baby
go down to 2 percent. Even though my body is still having
some trouble, my spirit is showing some signs of healing. I have
had such a precious group of friends pleading with God on my
behalf. They spoke for me when I couldn’t speak on my own.
And, as always, God has been teaching me despite myself.

In retrospect, all of that time I felt God had left me, I know He
was there. With each angry word, or pleading question, He
used the words He had written on my heart long ago to answer
me. He helped me battle what I felt with what I knew. God’s
Word is truth. He doesn’t lie.

When I felt cheated,

“He is the Rock. His work is perfect; for all His ways are
justice; A God of truth and without injustice; Righteous and
upright is He.” Deuteronomy 32:4

“I do not cheat you, dear one.”

When I asked why,

“And we know that God causes everything to work together
for the good of those who love God are called according to
His purpose for them.” Romans 8:28

“And all of us have had that veil removed that we can be mirrors
that brightly reflect the glory of the Lord. And as the Spirit of the
Lord works within us, we become more and more like Him and
reflect His glory even more.” 2 Corinthians 3:18

“I have a plan.”

When I felt alone,

“Let your conduct be without covetousness, be content with
such things as you have. For He Himself has said, ‘I will
never leave you or forsake you.’” Hebrews 13:5

“And those who know Your name will put their trust in You;
For You, Lord have not forsaken those who seek You.”
Psalm 9:10

“I am always with you.”

When I was afraid,

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and
of love and of a sound mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7

“I sought the Lord, and He heard me, and delivered me
from all my fears.” Psalm 34:4

“Don’t be afraid. I am with you.”

When I was sad,

“You number my wanderings; Put my tears into Your bottle;
Are they not in Your book?” Psalm 56:8

“He heals the broken hearted. He binds up their wounds.”
Psalm 147:3

“I care about you.”

And most of all, when I needed to feel loved,

“The Lord appeared of old to me saying, “Yes, I have loved
you with an everlasting love; Therefore with loving kindness
I have drawn you.” Jeremiah 31:3

“God is love.” I John 4:8b

“I love you.”


“I love you.”


“I love you.”

So tonight, I surrender my need for control. I thank God
for this baby. I have hope for their future. I trust Him for
whatever He deems fit. I praise Him for His constancy
and forgiveness. I cling to His truth. I am grateful to feel
His presence once more.

As ever, God has allowed a song to minister to my heart.
Please click on this link to hear J. J. Heller's  "Your Hands" .

He Keeps Me Singing

As you probably have noticed, music means a lot to me. For
every big moment and a lot of the small ones that I have
experienced, there is a song attached.

I love Chris Tomlin songs. His words match my feelings so many
times. This one of his songs that I am lifting up to
the Father today:

There is an endless song

Echoes in my soul

I hear the music ring

And though the storms may come

I am holding on

To the rock I cling

How can I keep from singing Your praise?

How can I ever say enough,

How amazing is Your love?

How can I keep from shouting Your name?

I know I am loved by the King

And it makes my heart want to sing.

I will lift my eyes

In the darkest night

For I know my Savior lives.

And I will walk with You

Knowing You'll see me through

And sing the songs You give.

How can I keep from singing your praise?

How can I ever say enough, how amazing is your love?

How can I keep from shouting your name?

I know I am loved by the King, and it

makes my heart want to sing

I can sing in the troubled times

Sing when I win

I can sing when I lose my step

And fall down again

I can sing 'cause You pick me up

Sing 'cause You're there

I can sing 'cause You hear me, Lord

When I call to You in prayer

I can sing with my last breath

Sing for I know

That I'll sing with the angels

And the saints around the throne

You make me sing, Lord.

Chicken Surprise

Tonight for supper we ate grilled chicken. Tess wanted to display her
superior knowledge of poultry, so she asked a question,
“Do you know why they call it chicken?" She answered it too.
"Because, it is made of chicken.”

“You are right, Tess.” I commented.

This statement of the obvious was not so obvious to Amelia.
She was about to take a bite of her grilled chicken and stopped. She
looked at Tess and then at me. “This is a chicken?”

I nodded. Her eyes got larger.

“A REAL chicken?”

I nodded again. She looked at the chicken leg that she was still holding
in mid-air.

“A Boak-Boak (chicken sound) chicken?”

“Yes, Amelia, that used to be a live chicken.” I said.

She took a bite, shrugged her shoulders, and took another bite.

“Which part is this—THE BRAIN?”

She continued eating as I explained that it was the leg. Apparently,
she has no particular attachments to live chickens.

Sun Kisses

When I walked out of the hospital this morning, I was met by
crisp autumn air and bright sunshine. I love fall. It was weather
fit for pumpkin picking, leaf raking, and bonfire making.
As I drove home, I let the windows down in the van.
That cool, clean air swirled about, tousseled my hair, and
caressed my skin.  I took long, deep breaths.
"It is all so perfect, God", I complimented my Maker.

He said, "Good morning, dear one."

I thanked Him again as I neared home for the beautiful land
surrounding the subdivision where we live. There are lots of
trees-mature, gorgeous trees. The sun beams reached through those
trees to kiss the earth beneath. A fog clouded the distance.
It was such a lovely sight. I stopped in the middle of the road
to drink it in. I also took a picture to share it with you.

Good morning, dear ones. Have a blessed day.

Love,

Anna

Dying For Pink Hair

While brushing and fixing Amelia’s hair this morning, she commented,
“Momma, everyone has yellow hair….or brown hair…..or white
(her papa’s) hair.”

“Yes, Amelia,” I replied, “There are lots of different hair colors. Hair
can be black or red too.”

“Yeah, Momma, like PINK hair!” Amelia exclaimed.

I explained further. “There is pink hair but it isn’t natural. People have
to dye it to make it pink.”

Amelia answered, “Well, when I die, I’m gonna have pink hair. God’s
gonna say, ‘Your hair is so pretty, Amelia!”